Sunday, January 10, 2016

Daddy, We Had a Good Day (A Bad Day Poem)

Me: Hey, honey! Were you ladies good today?
Older Daughter: I was!
Wife: Well, I don't know...

Today she pulled her sister's hair,
And made the cat wear underwear.

She smeared a little poop on the wall.
She sat on her sister while she was learning to crawl.

She threw away some important mail,
And emptied out the diaper pail.

She spilled some juice on the new couch.
She also let the hamster out.

She took the liberty of straightening her own bangs,
And scared the neighbor kid with some plastic fangs.

She ate her sister's snack at lunch.
She jumped on your laptop until it went crunch.

She had an accident in her pants,
And also used used soda to water the plants.

She cut the hair on her American Girl doll.
She also deflated her sister's favorite ball.

She stuck potato chips in the DVD player,
And hit her sister while she was saying her prayer.

She was rude to a little boy at the park.
She pulled a dog's tail until it went bark.

She worked at her drawing station and drew some questionable art,
And sat on her sister's head and cut loose a big fart.

She wiped a booger on that mean girl in the pink shirt at school.
She tattled on a boy in her class for breaking a rule.

But not every day is bad; they're almost all actually good.
And there really isn't anything better than fatherhood.

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